About Brad Alexander
There are two ways to make the transition into adulthood.
You can let it happen subconsciously and allow society to shape you at its whim.
Or you can take charge of the process and consciously become the type of man you want to be.
I am the latter. I was not happy with the type of man society was molding me to be. So I decided to take charge and take it upon myself to develop into the man I wanted to be.
My goal is not to teach you how to be best at dating, the best in the gym or how to be the manliest human being alive. There are plenty of other resources for that. Nor am I trying to tell you how to live. Nobody knows how to live better than you do.
What I am doing is giving you a bit of guidance and mentoring on growing into a man. That is something our fathers, uncles, grandfathers, teachers and society should be doing but are not.
My mission is to help you transition from having the mindset of a boy to the mindset of a man, to leave behind the juvenile attitude and develop a strong adult mind.
I do not possess any extraordinary capabilities beyond the average guy. I'm not massive, especially good looking or filled with natural talent. There is nothing that I have that you don't. But I learn things and I work hard. I set goals and achieve them. I don't sit around and talk a good game. I get out there and make things happen. I push the boundaries. I have focus.
Some Of The Things I've Done And Learned
Joined The Military: After college I joined the Navy. This was probably my most radical period of transformation.
Became A Fitness Hardcore: I have always been reasonably fit. But I never pushed myself to the limit. After being in the military I learned a new meaning of pain and how far the body can really go. Now I am a CrossFit junkie and I constantly push myself to the max.
Learned To Be Better With Women: I was never bad with woman, but I was never that great. At high school I wasn't that good at asserting myself as the man in a relationship, I tended to get a bit whipped. Now I am confident to chat up super attractive strangers, maintain healthy long term relationships and be the assertive man that a woman likes.
Started A Business: Starting a business is a major exercise in personal development. And it takes you from ass licking employee to your own badass boss. Now I set my own agenda and answer only to myself.
Took An Interest In Fashion And Grooming: I used to think that fashion and grooming were for metrosexuals only, and I didn't want a part in that. But that just made me sloppy. I learned in the military that real men can and do take pride in their appearance.
Learned Domestic Skills: This current generation thinks domestic skills are for women only. But men need to be able to cook, iron a shirt and keep their surroundings clean and tidy. I developed new habits and now excel at this.
Became A Mentor: I spent some time working for the police with troubled young men who don't have good adult role models. I taught them things and learnt things from them and the experience helped me understand a lot regarding issues with young men.
You don't need to be an exceptional person to become more manly. All you have to do is commit some time to learning and putting new things into practice. This is all I did.
What I Mean By Badass
I don't claim to be badass. That is not something you can bestow upon yourself. Badass is just a word I use in a generic way to describe my philosophy. It is not the perfect word but I think it works well enough. I am not encouraging you to become Hugh Hefner. Nor am I encouraging you to fulfil a stereotype where you must drive a motorcycle, be a rock star and sleep with countless women.
I use the word badass in the sense that you free yourself from having your life dictated by other people. You set your own boundaries and play by your own rules. You be the type of man you want to be, but you do it consciously. Whether that is living a playboy lifestyle, being a dedicated family man or any other lifestyle you wish to pursue. Being badass is conscious manliness.
Read more about what is a badass.
Why I Started Badass Young Men
It was a combination of things that led me to start this website:
Lack Of Targeted Material For Young Men
I do a lot of reading in the self improvement field and also in men's publications. A lot of it is crap and a lot of it is copycat stuff. But there are a few nuggets of gold hidden in amongst it all. The problem is not much of it is specifically targeted to young men, the category you and I fit into. While there are a few good young men's personal development websites a lot of it is aimed at middle aged men trying to escape the rat race.
Shallow Men's Publications
Many of the websites and magazines that do target the young male market are extremely shallow. They concentrate purely on superficial things like bedroom skills and a summer six pack. There is nothing wrong with having these things, in fact they are great, but they only scratch the surface of what it means to be a man. Without going deeper young men grow up thinking that pleasing a woman in bed is all it takes to be a man. There needs to be a place where the deeper issues of manliness and growing up can be discussed, along with key things like the art of pleasuring a woman and how to achieve low body fat.
I Was Having These Conversations In Real Life
There was an acquaintance I had who wanted to join the Navy. The problem was he had terrible grades, was overweight and unfit, had a problem with authority, lived with his parents and had never been able to hold a steady job. A deadbeat. I gave him no chance.
Yet he asked me to train him and help him work on his fitness. I am not the kind of person who tells someone they cannot achieve something. So I helped him and he improved.
In the end a chronic medical condition prevented him from getting in. But he made some serious progress. What he soon came to realize was that it was never just about fitness. He had many life issues that all overlapped. None of them were isolated problems. He was 20 at the time but had no sense of manliness. He was a 13 year old in a 20 year old's body. And it infected all areas of his life.
When he missed out on the Navy he gave up training with me. And we live in different cities now, but we keep in touch. While he has a long way to go he has made some serious improvements in life. He has got a job so he can make his own living and has moved out of his parent's house.
This experience inspired me to share my thoughts online. While I felt that society let me down in teaching me to become a man I realized that others felt the same way but didn't have the drive to do anything about it. Drive and motivation are things I've never been short of. So I started this website to help motivate others to begin their own journey and inspire them to take charge of their own development in masculinity.
You can read here about the people who have influenced me.